Tuesday, June 22, 2004

Uni gripes, my fashion sense and personal life

Added a new blog link. Vicki!
She's an anime enthusiast. :-)

*** ***

In those years gone by, to have completed your 'A' Levels was a fantastic, bravo, whoop-dee-doo-for-you, high achievement. But what is it today?
Merely a prerequisite for university. Even then, you need sparkling results to be given that coveted place.
What can you do with just 'A' Levels these days?
Unless you are in the civil service and are content with the pay you get.
Or, you can set up your own porridge store and be your own boss.

Today, a university degree is a sort of a whoop-dee-do-for-you also, i guess.
But many people out there are getting degrees too.
What's so special about yours and mine?
These days, you gotta have something higher, better, outrageously outstanding that you will make any gepster wanna skin and gut you.

On the other hand, our local universities (SMU is slightly different) are skinning the top to get the cream. And i think that is sad really.

Ok, this is NUS and NTU slamming.

In the local context here:
Today, to get anywhere and earn reasonably, you pretty much NEED a degree.
(or a diploma, which in my opinion is better than an 'A' Level qualification)
Call me narrow minded and idealistic. But it seems to me that reality demands that of you, whether you like it or not.

So, by having denied someone a university education, are they undermining someone's career and future?
So if they still want to get a degree, they have to search elsewhere for it.
Either do it by distance, go overseas or repeat the 'A' Levels, in hope of improvement.

The thing is:
- distance education is something employers aren't enthusiastic about,
- not everyone has the $$$ to go overseas,
- doing the 'A's again is hell and a very huge gamble, considering the time spent and chances that even with slight improvement, you still may be denied a place. In the last two years, local universities had a very screwed up system for selection. Of late, there have been changes but it seems to be switching over to selecting the cream, so we are back at square one.

So, is that fair for less outstanding students?
Do such students deserve to be denied a local uni education?
And get denied a good placing in society's eyes?

Should all students be given a shot at university education?
(All: meaning those who are interested in one.)

Whether they make it good or not, depends on them. It all weighs on their own shoulders as to whether or not they want to do well and get a nice looking certificate.

Ok, so the unis will be overflowing...
Who gives a fly?
Isn't E-D-U-C-A-T-I-O-N such a B-I-G thing in Singapore?

If my family had had the reserves, i would be over in Monash doing psychology already.

Maybe that will come after i am done here. One more year of uni overseas to seal the deal. Either an Honours or a Masters.

*** ***

I was thinking of how when i walk next to a particular friend of mine, i feel like the uglier party.

It crossed my mind that other people my age or looking like damsels while i am forever stuck in nerd-cum-sports-look land.

But if i change my hairdo to some girlish do, or cut it into some asymmetrical or some "cutesy" look, it so doesn't suit who i am and my overall... erm, aura.

If i get rid of my glasses, i think i can shed nerd-girl look by 20%?
But according to people, there seems to be an equal number of people on both ends with regards to me in glasses or without.

The whole problem is, I die die cannot wear contacts. Why?
Because i cannot touch or pinch my eyeballs for the life of me.
So, there is no way in ever that i can wear contacts.

That is the sad truth Jo, deal with it.

I like to dress up and dump on face paint sometimes, but the glasses do it in mostly.

Secondly, i am a NO FRILLS kind of fella. Ok, like i said, i like to (read the above line). But KEYWORD: SOMETIMES.

Mostly, you'd catch me in berms/jeans/shorts.
I don't like those heels stuff. Noisy and not suitable for my unladylike gait?
I am ok with skirts, but much rather wear pants. More freedom, more pocket space.
Tight fitting clothes just reduce freedom and chances of revealing things you don't wanna.

I have no qualms about going around town in a polo tee, shorts and track shoes.

I like clothes i can just throw on and not care how slim or fat i look in it.

I am the only one to blame if i feel ugly next to her.
But HEY. It's MY identity and i am proud of it.

Guess it just sucks when she gets all the stares. HAHA. TSK. Stupid Jo.

*** ***

I wish things were different in the personal life scene.

I am meeting people and things seem to go somewhere, but i admit, i don't think the ones who approach me are "special person" material.

It's just that the very first criteria, of being a Christian who shares the same values as me, is not fulfilled.

There haven't been any guys so far with whom i really had a connection with. Obviously the only one who had that with me was Mr Ex.
So far, i've had talks and such with people but never on that level.

Hm. Was thinking about this issue for a bit, and am a bit stuck. Maybe i'll continue some other time.

Talking about the past.

It's kinda weird to see someone you broke off with, but know so well, being everywhere else, except in your arms.
(I AM NOT HUNG UP ON HIM, it's just a feeling/acknowledgement of a thought that you get sometimes)

It's weird that we were once a couple, as one, but now as two separates, leading two different lives.
And when you happen to see him on the streets, a strange twanging happens.

If ever there was a chance to get back... (THERE WOULD NEVER BE, UNLESS IF BY DIVINE INTERVENTION) Would i?
If there was a chance at forgiveness on both family sides, if both of us change some things about ourselves, there might be a chance.
But of course, that is only an ideal and is nothing but an unreality.

Everything happens according to God's timing.
Like my buddy, good gal friend said. Perhaps God is still moulding me for the REAL DEAL and perhaps moulding him, whoever he may be, as well.
We can never tell. But as always...
My life, is in his hands.

Sometimes i wonder if that special person is right under my nose and that in time i will come to accept him as he is. But at this point, i just don't see that kinda feelings coming.

I look at the little scrolling thingy and find that it has strunk a great deal into almost a sqaure.
I have spent far too much time on this in place of what i should have been doing.

Till Then.
*National Team will be back home today with a number of medals!!! Singles and team events in both compound and recurve*

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