Friday, October 31, 2003


RE-EDITED (at the end)

For the next few days of bloggin, will not be discussing issues but just talking about mundane things. Exam period so... mundane thoughts are nice for a change.

To all,

RE: I got into SIM!!!

2. I bypassed two important criteria, WITHOUT FULFILLING them.

WEird huh.

The criteria was,
1. 21 years and above, and
2. you gotta have 2 years worth of working experience.

I had no qualification problems which was good.

After i had applied, i was praying all the way home.

Believe it? I was actually telling God all the pros if i go there. Exactly like how a desperate daughter would sound like when cajoling her daddy to buy her a handphone.

I decided to be ever so thick-skinned today.
I went down to the HQ and applied for the SIM scholarship.

What do i have to lose anyway?
That Chance.
If i hadn't tried.
Something untried, is a 100% loss.

Think i wouldn't have gotten the psych major in NUS. Hello? It's as hot as (me!!! ha, right...)soldering iron!

So now i can SPECIALIZE in Psychology and get my honours also. I was thinking of applying into NUS's post grad program for a Masters in Psychology once i'm done with my honours.

I promise, i could feel my double chin jingling as i walked to SIM.



I can't believe i got myself into that, i quote Liangcai, "Buaya Network" aka, Friendster.

Guys and girls go around and pick their choice meat.

I thought it would be fun cos then i can look for friends i never talked much to or haven't seen for ages. But the bit about digging for all them friends don't appeal somewhat.

I'll be candid and say that i don't think all of them mean enough to me to be kept in contact with.

Of course it is nice to know that you've found that long lost mate. The knowledge that you have their contacts with you and that at any one time, you can just talk to them.

Nice, nice. But some people just somehow... don't give the drive.

The traffic is congested thus slowing down the system.
When i could be blogging...

Hi Hartono,
haha. For a while there, you freaked me out. STALKER! Hawh ahawhhah... I mean, when was the last time we ever saw or HEARD from each other?

Helooo Huimin!
Nice to hear from you babe! Haha, thanks for he congrats on the socio essay. I hope u did well too. But i definitely don't doubt that you did! Oh, yeah. Thanks also for thee well wishes for the psych paper. And likewise, i hope you would do well for both your papers. Esp Comms...

You Are Beauty
You are Beauty.

You are beautiful, whether it be on the inside, the
outside, or both. People are drawn to you as
strongly as you are drawn to the beauty in the
world around you.

What Emotion Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

"mei" is part of my chinese name. What a nice coincidence. But man, I don't think i did it much justice.


Came back from church today.

Our Youth Pastor went on stage to tell us about the FEVER 100 thing.

It's the sending of 100 teams of Youths out into the South East Asia region for misson... The GREAT COMMISSION!!!

For some strange reason, i felt very compelled to go.
Usually these things never appeal to me.

Sigh. For reasons like, i don't really like people as much as i wish i did.

But somehow, it was pulling at the stringS of my heart that:


My dad seems eager to send me.
Too bad my sister may not go... gotta take care of the pooch while Aunty Gina is away in The Philippines.

Part of me is really getting excited!!!

But part of me is feeling shy and i feel this part of me beginning to shrink away into the denial zone where my mind chooses to say NO and just shove everything new and scary away.

God willing, he will make my way clear and i can go through with this in His Strength.

Till Then.
*flings arms around my dear dear dear psychology textbook and gives it a wet smoochie slobbery kisss*

Wednesday, October 29, 2003

Something to Share

Two Boxes

God's Boxes

I have in my hands two boxes,
Which God gave me to hold.

He said, "Put all your sorrows in the
black box,
And all your joys in the gold."

I heeded His words,
and in the two boxes,

Both my joys and sorrows I stored,

But though the gold became heavier each

The black was as light as before.

With curiosity, I opened the black,
I wanted to find out why,
And I saw, in the base of the box,

A hole.

Which my sorrows had fallen out by.

I showed the hole to God, and mused,
I wonder where my sorrows could be!"

He smiled a gentle smile and said,
"My child, they're all here with me."

I asked God, why He gave me the boxes,
Why the gold and the black with the hole?

My child, the gold is for you to count
your blessings,

The black is for you to let go."

(courtesy of an email sent by an ex-classmate)

See what Care Bear you are.

OMGoodness. I beg to differ...
But one bit is true... so far.

Anyway. I'm going to entirely forget about studying for now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just finished my sociology exam. My very first exam of the year and very first in my University life.

You know i entirely DIDN'T BATH YESTERDAY??? Haha, don't know why i'm saying this. Yeah so anyway, i didn't bath and wash my hair man. Wuhk...
But of course i bathed this morning before going for my exam. Bet you're thinking why this goondu didn't bath.
Well... because... uh. Was mugging for my paper. Pai seh.

Oh, i'm so happy.

For those who don't know... i began having this mild phobia of getting results. This was a because of: almost flunking my VERY FIRST assignment in uni.

To think that i put so much effort and thought into it only to have it stuffed back to me with some unsightly mark, was so discouraging.
Depression for 3 days.
Then i got my ass back on track and did my next assignment.

And so on monday, i went to collect my assignment.
Could feel my face flushing, and my body and neck was heating up under my polo t-shirt's collar.
When the guy on duty gave it to me, i walked a little distance away.

Thumbed away all the top right hand corners of my work to reveal the last page which contains the mark and grade and evaluation.


I got a D!!!!!!!

Haha, no lah. D means Distinction.

And let me say that i am, by no means very arty, expressive, original, articulate and whatnot.
Been doing science all me life and never did any kind of writing like this.

This is truly by God's Grace.
No words to express my gratitude except for a "Thank You LORD" that was muttered after i got my work.

Well, i sure do hope that i pass my exam. I'm not asking for much... I just don't want to repeat the module. If i have to... i'll just break down and...

mumble and mumble and mumble....

Oh yeah, and the best part about my exam?

The 2 essay questions that i studied out of the 3 given b4 the exam itself,- CAME OUT!!!-
Will you believe it?
Right on the dot.
Thank God.

Actually, after reading about how God does wonders for those who really rely on Him, and do everything not in our own strength, but in his, i was very inspired.
Was also inspired to keep the relationship with God going on... I know my faith kinda lagged in JC and all. It had quite an effect on my life. Negatively of course. Those times, i even doubted that God was listening when i pray. I felt as if i was talking to myself.

Thank You to all the people out there who have written your testimonies for me and others in need of spiritual refreshing to read!

Oh. While sitting around with my friends today, a long lost friend called me up!!! haha... Hartono are you reading this?

I honestly thought he was some stalker or some person who got my number from somewhere and decided to terrorise me. (sorry to suan u until like this...)

Haha, turned out to be Hartono, my senior from secondary school. Well? The wonders of Friendster man. I don't use Friendster cos i screwed up my registration thing. So i don't bother. Maybe next time.

ER... more stuff to blog?
I know i have a long list of stuff to discuss. Just not now. I still have to mug for my psychology paper.
Now, studying for psychology is something that i ACTUALLY ENJOY.

YES. Can sleep early tonight. A rare opportunity to do so.

Oh yeah...

I went to "Barang Barang", the nice furniture shop, at Tanglin Mall to check out the stuff and also to check out the "Aesthetics" corner.

The "Aesthetics" corner, is a new division and concept that sells woven bags, hair and other accesories and make-up.
So yeah, Betty (my good friend) and I were the models for it.

Apparently Germaine's (another good friend) sister works in the marketing department for Barang Barang so she wanted us to do it.
It was fun. We took the photos at Botanic Gardens.

I stood at the corner for some time looking at them.

Interesting. It feels so weird seeing Betty's and my face on the advertisements.

Good thing no one seemed to recognise me.
So much for the cameraman's comment on, "Next time when you go there, you must wear sunglasses already..."

Enough blogging.

Till then.
*mugging psych*

Sunday, October 26, 2003

The Battle Heads On.

This is a moment thing which can't wait for later.

-Groan- Don't Laugh...

THE HOUSE IS BEING INVADED BY HUUUGGGGEEEE SIX LEGGED FLYING-ANT, CROSS BEE-LIKE LOOKING THINGYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've killed something like 12 of them.

This was how.

1. Took insecticide.
2. Closed the room door.
(them things were buzzin' all over my ceilin' light)
3. Take spray, aim at the group of 'em.
4. *PppphhhhhhhhhIIIiiiiiissssssssshhhhhhhhhhh*
5. Watch them go a bit woozy and drunk and fall to the floor.
6. I run and hide in my bathroom and close the door!
7. Wait for a moment.
8. Come back out.
9. Watch 'em die.
10. And watch 'em die.
11. And watch 'em die.
12. And watch 'em die.
13. And watch 'em die.
(n). And watch 'em die.

And this doesn't help because i'm trying to do my SOCIOLOGY EXAM PREP! And my room is where my PC is.


There are now like FIVE caught in their death trap in my ceiling light cover. You know, the space between the half spherical ceiling light cover and the round gas bulb.


My room smells of the spray. Not as bad as my sister's who was trigger happily spraying the buggers.
Hope they stop buggin' us.
I must say i'm a pretty good slayer. hahaha.

Half way through, my dad came out to aid in the Battle of the Flying Bugs. So Aunty Gina and i were runnin' around the house screaming and laughing just for the heck of it.
Ah, but the slayer(of at the moment 12) needs some fun, does she not?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Another TWO!?!??!


Gonna get you, you nasty little bugger.

I am the Slayer. Of 14. Nasty Buggers.

(this is reporting LIVE from Joline's bedroom)

Crudddy Fuddy MUDDY WuddY!

The thing is buzzing to its death on my Sociology TextBook!
Ok, just put it outta its misery.

I just don't know how they get in. They are buzzing outside my window. But my windows are securely closed. How they get in, is beyond me.

My dog, being the bred hunter he was meant to be, mangled and mauled two or three others.
Quite well done, i must say.

-Mutter- Ok, really have to get my work done.

With or Without them things.

Till Then
*Be afraid. Be very afraid*

Friday, October 24, 2003

I know. Again.

Am back in my sane frame of mind.

I've added a new blog link.Huimin's blog.

I'll address everyone's comments and whatnot (my scribbles on paper that I promised) after the dreaded, worksheet-that-one-must-do-alone-sitting-on-a-seat-all-by-yourself-in-a-big-place-a-claustrophobic-would-be-proud-of.

Hi Nicole!!! That's if you're reading this of course. You can check out other blog entries by going to the Archives. Have a nice day okie. -schmile...-

Once again, can't resist the urge to give my fingers a work-out but I'm not saying anything more.

Exam Hiatus.

Till then.
*salutes all ye fellow beings*

Wednesday, October 22, 2003


On a high, on a high, ona high

Am bouncing off the walls at home. Running back and forth the corridor and shrieking, screechin'

I'm squeaking at a higher than soprano pitch scream. And going round the house irritating everyone. What wrong, what's wrong.
I don't know. Loony loony.

Am blogging not for the reason of typing out a coherent argument but rather to let off steam!!!

Athink i'm not even going to correct my spelling for this one. to #%&#$^ to today's english!!!!!1 So? so ?so? so? so? so? So?? so ?

on a high hon gha hihg.... bouncging off the walls.

Had too much sugar i think?? I think./
Was too thsirsty, yeah, i was. Too thristy, too thirsty. yeah.

Been mugging been mugging and thoughts kept going around around in my head. I have a whole collection scribbled down on aperp, wait till u se, wait wait.

After exams.

Loony loony.

WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And i'ma psych student. what the.

who's crasy? who's crasy? Whoever said they were carzy? And then ? Were they ever this crazy??????? HAve they ever thought this way? What ISSSS CRAZY?? What is?THISS is crazy.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If u ever thought you can coherent speech, have some formsane mind. Not me not me not me notm.e..

Music. Music. yeah good for the soul
Listen. Do u hear it? dO you??

Ouside. Hear the sky, the trees. , birds. the piano .Do u hear the chordds????????????
Thw world. The world

Glory, the world. thw orld. Sick na d tired old place, stupid, cruel, crazy..
Why do i feel this way. Why. why. why.

On a hihgh on ahihg.. high high high high

Saturday, October 18, 2003

Partial Freedom

After i sent my work on its way to the markers' refining fire, i feel a sense of relief... and an anvil has been temporarily lifted off me. -phew- Now comes the next few laps.

1. Study Abnormal Psych
2. Do the Abnormal Psych Interlearn activity
3. Mug for Sociology Paper (crud)
4. Mug Psychology 1B Paper.

Wuh hur hurhurhhurhur.

More stress. And the time frame for each of these aren't very forgiving.

Notice that the weather patterns are something like, rain then shine. Alternatively.

The sky is awesome. Inspiring Awe.

Everytime i see the sky like this. True blue with pretty white clouds, i think how it'd be like to just SHOOT up there in a rocket strapped to my back.
Assuming that the rocket is indestructable that is.

The sky's blue looks so perfect like that, it looks like a solid wallpaper. It's like if i shoot there, i might have to crash through this layer of paper first.

But you and i know it's more than that of course.

All we can see is the the blueness of the sky. And no further. With our naked eye. It's infinity beyond that. How beautiful.
But beneath the blue sky, things aren't so perfect.
Such is this sorry and cruel world.

Hey Alwyn!
I love long comments, so, write away!
I've not heard of that pianist you metioned, the Final Fantasy one. I think the piano cd i have from FF doesn't have the titles and artist. But i'll go check it out.
Although i've shifted emotionally to more happy music, sad songs are still a fav to soak in.
David Lanz's music is not totally sad i agree. It has a more beautiful, touching, gentle and uplifting tinge. I love the piece called "Improvisation: Gli uccelli di Carpi" or "The Birds of Carpi" from the album "Return to the Heart".
If i'm not mistaken, he recorded his music from that CD in Europe, at "landmark settings" in Europe. Amazing what the atmosphere did for his music.
Bleah. Imagine what his music would sound like if he came and recorded his music in the middle of Orchard Road.
Whao.. 7.6sec??? That's Poh Seng Song all right! Hahaha... give the bookworm here a little credit will ya.
He's going pro and trains hard. I don't... and am an ultimate blob, but i am somewhere like 3 seconds behind? As for your class guys... as much as i am a little bit of a feminist, they are guys after all and they're generally faster than girls. What more than this blob!
But i am definitely NO long distance runner. Suck entirely at that. No marathons for me please.
Oh yes, have you heard of this pianist, Keiko Matsui? Ok, her music isn't all sad. It pretty much depends on which album you get. But i was hooked onto the first song i ever heard her play with some other pianist. Some duet.
She came to Singapore LAST YEAR, and i was so darn cheesed... DURING 'A' Levels????!?!?!??! What duh.
Missed my chance to catch her Live.
Her music is classified as somewhat New Age, but Jazz as well.
But some are sad stuff. I think one such album is "Deep Blue". Vaguely remember.
There's this music shop that sells scores of scores. (haha, okok.) They have piano, flute, saxophone... etc. It's a place where music teachers go to for material too i think. That's where i got the majority of my David Lanz piano books. I even ordered them in from the States. Mad Fan, I am.
Honestly, i don't really get a lot of teacher gossip or student gossip in ACJC, because most of the time, i don't mix with the "on" people in school. Most of the time was just caught up with work. Not much of a social life. Which means i haven't heard of Harvinder Singh's record... But man....i don't like Gurmit Singh. Roberta Ng's scary. Lawrence Ang, is Mr. IronMan. He knows my sister. Cos of canoeing.


Immediately after my exams this year, i will be starting my summer semester, it is called. So i'll be doing Psychology 1A. Then i can start on the "main" Psych modules beginning next year, Semester 1.

Maybe will blog later. Gotta plan my syllabus to re-enrol. Aiya, why Monash like dat one.

Might be continued...

Friday, October 17, 2003

Mixed bits and waiting.

I told myself: No bloggin' shit for the day. Get home and sleep.

Utter nonsense after all. Blog gonna be in short sentences.

Waiting for hair to dry. Hence good excuse to blog.

Jogged 3.2km, sprinted up and down the jogging track for another 200m at least, on wednesday.

If there's any sport that i utterly love to bits, it has to be SPRINTING.

First look at me, and you'll never think i could run. haha.
Fat thighs.

Used to run for my house all the time in secondary school.

Boasting here:
Everyone needs to boast.

Harvinder Singh, my class PE teacher in ACJC even commented i was fast.

My shuttle run was about 10.5sec.

And this is comparable to my other classmate Christine Goh who got 10.3sec, i think. And she's some long distance runner.

Ok, maybe long distance people aren't necessarily fast in sprints. But still. She's light and trains.

And what.
I am just a bum who draw horses and mugs at home.


Ok, i hear you guys larfing your arses off and going, "Ohhh YEeahhhhh right...."

My blog. My blog. My blog. My blog. My blog. My blog. My blog.
Did i tell you i used to be a depressed wreck in sec sch and in jc?

David Lanz day in day out. Sad music. Talk about sad things. Hated people. Pathetic.

But things have changed.


Headache setting in. Slept at 3am this morning. Doing psych rda assignment.


Studied Abnormal Psych today in class.

Wanna blog but bed beckons.

Will go.

reminder: dimensions

Till Then.

Thursday, October 16, 2003

This Moment

I won't forgive myself if i get by this moment without proclaiming this.

The weather is soooooo beautiful. The sky is a true blue, with few wispy white clouds. Graceful and dainty in the sky. The sun is in its full glory. Bright, golden mid afternoon rays.
And the wind... Ah.

Such a cheery day. So beautiful. Cannot help but say: Thank You God.

Holy, Holy, Holy Lord.
God of Power and Might
Heaven and Earth are full of your Glory
Hosanna in the Highest

This blog is not over... Will continue later. School beckons.

It's 9:35pm, now.

I'm going to forget about blogging the things i have in mind cos i am bogged down with a psych assignment due tomorrow.

-mumble, mumble-

How to sleep tonight????!?!?! So stressed. Argh...........................................

Till then.
*mugging thy ar** off*

Wednesday, October 15, 2003

All Right!!!

Hello Peoplez.

Kudos to Alwyn who gave the technophobe the website for the comments thingy! Thanks a lot, it is very much appreciated. Yay!!! Now you guys can leave me more stuff and your messages won't get deleted along the way. Tagboard can offer something nice but not like this!

Hey Liangcai, thanks for that interesting bit of info. Ah hah, so Heaven is another dimension altogether. Yus! yus! I wonder how those mathematicians explain Heaven, the divine place, after all.
Imagine what it's like to be in the 4th dimension? Whee!!!
Or how about 2nd or 1st dimension. Interesting sia~. And the messages... i'm not sure what to say because it's something totally new! Where'd you read it by the way mate? Woah. The bit about plucking messages from the waves is darn supernatural.

Oh, i read Weizhen's blog and i found it really farni and cute in it's quirky way. You funny girl, you.

It's 12:35am now. The rain is pouring fast and furious. But not sure if it it's the kind that lasts for long. But it sure is scary to listen to, but exhilarating.

It's scary because it makes my childhood fears come back.

When i was younger, i would come home from school to find the room doors closed. Not sure why they were closed then, so i used to think that it's because behind the door, the room is filled to the CEILING with rainwater. So whenever i opened the door to peep if dad and mom were home(or if the room was full of rainwater) i would be breathing shallow, creaking the door open ever so slowly and when there was no water to wash me off my feet, i'd open it all the way.
Think "Jumanji" the movie.

Rain is exhilarating.

Once when i was having a Leadership Camp at St. John's Island, the whole bunch of us got caught in the rain at the beach, which was at the base of the island. But man.... i was silently enjoying my wet, wet paradise.

Sat on the bench, open to the pelting rain. Could feel the rain just coursing down my head, onto my face, down my neck, just soaking me up.

Glory... it was so wonderful.

It was one of my favourite places/scenarios to be in. Sitting at the beach, wind blowing cold, staring off into the sea and soaking up the rain.

Ahhh, Paradise.
And the leaders had to spoil it by ordering us all back before we catch our deaths.

Reminder for myself: things of the night
Never mind if you don't get it.



Till Then.
*need to get dog off bed first*

Monday, October 13, 2003

The Gathering

Hello Liangcai!
Yup... you're right, the archives do move around when the entry is short. It appears at the bottom of the page. Argh, blogspot has it's ways. Hmmm........ Haven't figures out why yet.

Hello Liting!
Wa... now then visit me huh. Nice to see your name on my tagboard though!
Visit me more often so i know you still exist... CAn't wait to see ya'll this 9th DEc! You know i know la hor. Hee~...

Yesterday, my dad and i had a nice discussion after lunch.

I told him about the dogs-have-no-spirits thing so, the mad creature running around the house could just be an empty shell.
From there we proceeded to talk about the galaxy and Heaven.

I love astronomy.

Do you remember the movie Men in Black?
Especially the last part where the camera zooms out from the scene to the
the Milky Way,
and then some fictionous aliens playing around with our galaxy?

That particular bit got me thinking.

The Universe is SO INFINITE, it probably, ISN'T a Universe. We've been hearing things about it being a Multiverse.


Who would know till some bunch of astrologists are bestowed with this jolly powerful brainwave (that may drive them insane) and come up with the solution to see beyond our Milky Way<--(that's unless i'm way behind astrology news, enlighten me, if you will, if they've gotten past the Milky Way)

Yes, but i've always been fascinated with whatever's beyond our Milky Way. Argh. It's giving me flash backs of a yummy bar of chocolate.

Aw, yes... (how APT!) Listening to Holst's The Planets: Jupiter-Bringer of Jollity. BEAUTIFUL PIECE. The tune is being used for a new hymn. I never knew it had anything to do with it till our ex Vice? Can't remember... ex Vice Principal Miss Gracia Ng of ACJC told us and then proceeded to sing in her dramatic but rather good vocals.

I know ACJC band has played it before. But we never did it any justice. In fact, lately, ACJC band hasn't done many songs much justice.

I speak from experience.

Back to the galaxy. Imagine.
The Space out there is so vast. So vast that everything is left to the imagination or constant speculation. How wonderful!
And everyone has been dying to know the ga-za-ti-bill-mil-lion question, whether we are the only living things in the whole fat SPACE.

When you think how INFINITE Space is, and how SMALL our little Earth is,


The ratio of the Earth to Space is... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

So, imagine. How would other supposed Beings function, look like, think? Do they have technology? Do they wonder about whether WE exist? Do they shoot things into the sky so they can sneak peeks at us too?

Then came the topic about Heaven and Earth.

My dad was saying that Heaven is actually another DIMENSION altogether. So, for all you know, it could be all around us at this very second. I don't know how true cos i have not read it myself but just a note nonetheless.

Has anyone ever read "A Wrinkle in Time"?
It's a book for younger people but i tell you it's REALLY GOOD. REALLY GOOD. It's about a girl called Meg, her brother and Meg's friend who team up to rescue her father who is stuck in another dimension. Her brother is this genius, really, but is "taken" by this Brain thing who has her father captured.
The story unwinds in a very engaging manner. With strange backdrops and characters along the way.
I love it.

Oh. About dimensions. Yes. So we were talking about them.

I said in jest, that if there were a Heaven just for animals, it would be so crowded.

Picture: *sQwak! Sqwakkk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!* *flap, flap, flap* *Get off thee, thou smelly(foul, haha) Fowl!* *oookk, ook,okkk* *Ouch! now cease the stealing Primate! Just about to bless you with one, just you wait you little rat...*
[dialogue by Saint.(erm...) Peter?]

Then my dad said that Heaven is no physical entity rather it is a whole different dimension. That it may just be all around us. It doesn't take up space.

God is going to have so many questions from me and from all those who died.
He's gonna need a Noticeboard.

Just before i meet my creator, he stops me and says, "Joline, don't ask, for I know what your mind seeks to find. Please go to the noticeboard. If you fail to conceive, then come and seek me and i shall be more then happy to explain unto thee."


Death had been so close.

When i was at the Grand Canyon some 2+ years ago, i was observing this pretty plant along the cliff side.
It just takes 1 shove and i'd be done for.
I was just ONE step behind Death.
It's that simple.

When i stand at the 16th floor, i just have to lean a liiitle bit more, and Death would claim me.

Have to go aid the mommy with the groceries.

Till then.
*Skips out the door...*

Saturday, October 11, 2003

Wandering. Wondering.

Since today has 2 entries, remember to click on today's date again to see all.

For those people who left something on my tag board, i wrote something to ya'll if you haven't already read them.

Came back from church this evening.

The message scared me some.

It was a sequel to the previous one by our senior pastor last week about "unknown whatchamacallit." Can't remember.

This week, it was about: Our salvation is free.
But here on Earth, we have a job to do.
That's even if people don't recognize you for them.
Our treasures are stored in Heaven.
Our standing in Heaven actually depends on it.
What are you going to do with your life?

It really scared me.
Because for one.

I will admit that I'm no great Christian. Really. Yes, I do have a relationship with God but it gets shaky sometimes.
I am born into a Christian family and I've been so blessed for my 18+years. The harsh reality of life sometimes doesn't sink in.
So when things go wrong, I have the tendency to get angry with God because I feel like everything should've just continued being nice and rosy. I try to tell myself God is always there for me, but sometimes the anger gets the foothold.
Which just shouldn't be the case.

I don't go to cell and don't join the Youth service. Honestly, the problem lies both with me and the Youth service. I don't like the people there one bit because I've been hurt once by this cell leader. He was a discriminating #$%^ and that really hurt, since I was only a young teen then and REALLY sensitive.

And so, reviewing my life so far, I don't think I've done anything worthy to be called a "Good and Faithful servant" by God. Maybe I might end up being Head of Road Sweepers in Heaven.

It's not just that I want a great life in Heaven.

It's the crushing, awful, feeling you get when you know someone who loves you is disappointed in you. I got that so often when I failed JC exams and my dad had no choice but to sign those papers saying I failed.

It's the feeling of letting someone down.

I should be mugging now but there were so many things to think and write about. This was one of them.

Actually the other was this.

My dog of 7 years died when I was in JC1, during the first few TRAUMATIZING weeks of school. Really added to the weight of depression ok.
So I was thinking. In relation to the animals-no-spirit thing.
When I go to Heaven, and ask God: "God, could you reunite Prints(my dog's name) and me? I've missed him so much for all this time."
Do you think it's possible?
After all, nothing is impossible for God.

But then even if he is brought back, will he be just a re-creation fabricated from the memories that i've had of him, or would he be the real dog(in spirit lah) i used to have?

Ok, i know talking about his using a dog may sound silly. But really, i say this because animals are said to have no spirit.


Interesting word.

About relationships.

After ending the saga with the ex, things came in stages. (but they're more or less mixed up here)
Happy. now and then.
Haunting memories.
Thoughts of reconciliation that i knew would be useless.

Then... Forgiveness.

I more or less got over him.

Now, it's a different story.


Though i admit that i wish i could have a better social life and a partner.
But i contradict myself.

I shun thoughts of meeting people.
I shun thoughts of being with somebody.

The pain of the past has really made me prefer to avoid relationships although i would like one. How i contradict myself directly!

Well. Brooding stops here.

Anyway, i honestly think most guys find me too mad, noisy, ungirl-like, un-sweet and downright "just friend material". And probably get scared.
All i can say is that, should some fella decide to allow his sorry #$% to like me, at least i know that he likes me, for me.
At least to some degree.

Now, my life revolves around:
1. Family (including my beloved Jed the MinPin. After finding out what he really was like, wanted to call him Bandit instead)
2. Church
3. School Work
4. Eating
5. Sleeping
6. Blogging...

Sigh. It be 10pm.

I've discovered that late nights are no longer for me. I could do it in JC but no more...
I get these terrible headaches that impair me for the entire day.

Ok. I know that this is going to sound very self indulgent. But i'm saying this because i've never dreamt that i would have done this before AND this is something totally new to me.
Do you remember a furniture shop called "Barang Barang", that sells Balinese themed furniture?
Good stuff.
If you walk into a branch, say the one at Great World City, if you go over to the Lifestyle/Aesthetics(whatever) corner, look around and you might find me smiling at you.
(hm... ha, that sounds scary don't it)

Oh, yes. I remember this song. I'm going to try to recall it so forgive me if it sounds funny. But i hope Alwyn, if u are reading, can identify with it.

So you were in it after all
All of those times that i spent crying
Something inside of me was dying
I didn't know that you were there each time i called...

And it's easy now to see it
I don't know how i could've missed it
You were in it after all...

We're always ready Lord to take the Glory...
But we're seldom willing to endure the pain
You were with me when the sun was shining
And you were there beside me when it rained...

Will cease the blog for now. May or may not continue.

Till Then.
*turns off computer*

Continuation. Responding.

Oh salutations my dear people.

(hi January, if you're reading this, i wrote something for you yesterday)

I decided to post a new one cos i didn't want you guys to scroll through the other post and filter out the new bits.
See, i'm soooo kind. (okok, dying to kick my butt right)

Hello Alwyn, nice to hear from you! Hey, why wouldn't i mention you? It's my pleasure to interact with you and nice to read what you have to say or comment.
Actually, yes, good suggestion you made about the comments thingy. You see, i'm a technophobe (hahaha) so i have no idea how to do those html thingys. Save for Liangcai who gave a crash course.
Hm, do you have any idea how to install that comment thing onto the blog so you guys can type longer msges? The tag board tends to lose all the previous msges.

Haha... you flatter me about the Police thing. I must first of all get through the 6 or 9 months of training. I've heard of this person who gave up half way cos it was too tough.
Hm, but yes, you've sure given me sights to set on. Maybe one day... i'll be hosting CRIMEWATCH! Hahaha.
ASP Audrey Ang STEP aside and MAKE way for DSP Joline Lim!
(Joline, cease the ego trip)
Yes, about the Psychological Unit. That be interesting. You know there're so many divisions in the Police Force, i'm not sure where i'll be heading. Guess that's what the FBI guy and his friend Renee are there for. To answer this wannabe's questions.
Oh, good that you mentioned it too cos am considering taking one of the psychology modules that focus on counselling.

Hee, yes. I wanted to be a zookeeper. Which animal lover can resist all those animals day in and out? Argh, i can't. And i have this fetish for horses. Plus, i'll be surrounded by nature and everything. So beautiful. Of course there's the downside but with so many animals, i can't complain.
Oh, if you haven't already and want to see my pet dog, click on "My Slavedriver". That was mostly when he was still a pup. Well, he's still more or less that tiny lah.

Don't get a miniature pinscher if you have little patience for a:
1. Thief
2. Havoc Wreaker
3. Grand Prix speed equalivant when he has stolen something
4. Howler
5. Resident curious, ultimate KAY-POH
6. Greedy hog
7. an influx of Ticks!
8. Ferocious Biter
9. Mouthful of naturally sharp adult teeth (normally adult teeth are blunt)

I knew of a family that gave up their miniature pinscher (minpin) after 2 weeks because couldn't take its high powered agenda.

But if you can take all their nonsense, congratulations! You will embark on a very exciting, frustrating and entertaining journey with the pooch. He comes up with some new antic every few days. He's darn intelligent and very human-like. He's eyes are the brightest ever and he absolutely goes wild when you come home. Races around the house, macham F1!

They are loyal, loving, very smart, REALLY acrobatic, regal, handsome dogs. They have a mind of their own. And are NOT lapdogs. Unless, he's
1. Darn sleepy
2. Making use of you

Just today, i was "wrestling" with my dog. This goes like.

I just lie on the bed and stretch my arms out with my palms facing up. He likes to stick his nose into my palm so that i can grab his snout and then he'll proceed to wrestle with my hand.

But as i closed my eyes while he was pulling and chewing, a thought just came.

Besides humans on Earth who exist, there're also animals. And here i was feeling this Life tugging and playing away, very much alive. Muscle, bone, and brain (and more) all working to function. Same as us humans.
However, what runs this animal? As humans we have souls, there's this side of us that is instrinsic and special. Something wonderful. A real Life that continues to live even after death.
But do animals have the same thing? If they don't, it's sad and quite scary to think that this beloved dog of mine is merely just a shell with no soul. Just a life that ceases to exist once the physical heart stops.

Just muscle, bone and brain (and more)... but nothing more.

Good News to myself and all who's reading.
I got a 7 out of 10 for my Psychology Poster. WAH-HOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Happiness.

Thank you, God.
Oh, Thank you.

I was developing this phobia of receiving results since the first assignment i did.
It was this 1000 worded Sociology essay on GLOBALIZATION (alamak) that i put plenty effort into but i almost flunked it.
It caught me off guard and really upset me for 3 days.

I tell you. Monash Uni markers are scary.

It's 12:16am, time to sleep. But i know i have more to say. Hm... dig dig dig into recesses of mind.

-My episodic memory is failing me at the moment-

My dog's claimed my bed. Sprawled right smack in the middle.

Thank God for Maths C in JC!
Psychology has this whole whatchamacallit... yes, module all on Research Design and Analysis. What is it? Experimental methods and STATISTICS.

Oh, in ACJC i had Miss Phang (oh horror) the Ha**y L**s for my Math C teacher. Ok, i know some people may like her but she doesn't sit well with me, and i think it's mutual.
Why? Simple. I sucked at math and it didn't help that most people around me were ok. And i was always recruited into those Math Special classes for Math bimbos like me. Well, i got a C for Math C for 'A's ok.


Statistics was my BIGGEST headache. In fact, i ended up learning stats mostly all by myself. I gave up on all teachers, and borrowed a book all on stats from the bloody cold ACJC library and studied from there. Of course, i must give credit to my very helpful pals who tried to coach me, even when i got darn irritating. Hm, the book was borrowed for so long, it even became overdue until after the 'A's. :-P

Oh, my form teacher Kelly Koh has gone to Japan to teach English. So drastic. I wonder what made him to *ting!*. I'm going to Jap-land. My cousin who's in swimming and therefore knows Kelly Koh says that maybe he likes Japanese girls. What rubbersquash.

Talking about cousins. My family is one AC family in itself. All my uncles save for one were from ACS. My dad is pure ACSian. My sister was also from ACJC, canoeing. My two guy cousins(Enoch and Ian) were in ACS since primary school to JC and joined swimming. Enoch is in Choir in addition to swimming. So... he was governed by the Koh siblings. You know. Mr Kelly Koh and Mrs Wilson,formerly Miss Valerie Koh. Enoch's in JC2 now. They have two more sisters both studying in MGS.

Me. Concert Band lor.

THE ALTO SAXOPHONE ROX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have my intermediate Yamaha flute that i kinda wanna trade for a better one because its tone is not so swell. But this flute of mine has sentimental feelings attached to it.

Written Enough.

Till then.
*Hugs Dog to sleep*

Friday, October 10, 2003



For those who didn't scroll down my previous blog that was edited and re-edited and re-re-edited...

I will be talking to this man from the FBI stationed at the American Embassy about Police Work after i've garnered all my questions.

However, my mom has advised me to pray about it first. Right, she is.
It was quite a large fishball for my parents to swallow when i told them where my ambition lay. Even when i was talking and spilling out the beans, i felt that everything so not me. Didn't sound like me. Sounded cliche. But i'm not ashamed to say that what i said was really from my heart.

For a while, they didn't take me seriously. How can i blame them? After all, in my years i've aspired to be:

1. A Vet (must go overseas man, and no institute here offers a degree in Vet Science)
2. A Horse Trainer.
3. A Zookeeper
4. A musician in the SYO (Singapore Youth Orchestra) and then the SSO. (But these changed drastically when i realised that the standard they require was somewhere........................ psst, can u see? it's too high for me to see) Anyone who knows Mark Ho from 2SA1 and has heard his tootling on the flute will understand.
5. A nobody, after a while.

Anyway. ARGhhh.
Guess wot. just a while ago, i was a light brown, gold and ash streaked headed PUNK. (now i hear my sister larfing her arse off)
The tad bit too light hair didn't quite sit well with me so i got a DIY darker dye to cover the unbleached streaks. According to the instructions, it wasn't for darkening my streaks, which i wanted to keep. So, i quite happily dyed my hair.


I'm back to goody goody looking girl with dark brown hair and, where are my streaks?!??!?!?!?!?!?
GONE!!! -WAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh-

Never mind. It's only hair.

However, i've learnt one good thing. Garnier's hair dye is good in the sense that it is affordable, has nice smelling conditioner, has a very handy applicator that makes dyeing so easy and is gentle. I like. The colour is more visible over lighter hair but over un-dyed hair, it is a little harder to see.

Oh hi Jan or January (nice name)! Yes, i've spotted your blog on Liangcai's and Alwyn's. Figured out that you were the same person, after all i was led to the same blog. Rather nice blog, i must add. Hee, yes.... we students of Psychology must first go through the trouble but man, i love the subject. Don't you?
Think you're in Uni of Melbourne right? That's a good Uni. Was considering that but i found the fees way over the budget. Is it comfortable there?
Speaking about small world, yes it is. Actually got to know Liangcai while on a tour in the USA and it turns out things have this roundabout way. His brother was in J1 when i was in J2 in ACJC. And a few other things can't really remember. (Sorry dude, for discussing you so openly. he heh heh.)
Thank you for the well wishes for that dreaded Lab Report. Hope i can get a decent mark for it. Them markers in Monash are unpredictable. Actually, i think i just haven't gotten used to the Aussie Uni requirements/standard.

As a Christian, i know that once my life is in God, He will never step away. Seems impossible to conceive especially when we are at our WORST but it's true.
Think about it. Everytime you think you are alone, you're actually not. And the knowledge that a Being higher than me is watching over, is comforting.

Thursday, October 09, 2003

People are Strange. So am I. Or am I?

Today didn't start off well.

1. I slept at 2+am because of that Psychology Laboratory Report.
2. So i woke up at about 10:15am.
3. I hate waking up late.
4. I feel the onset of my trademark headache.

Ever since secondary school, i was never one to like people, or more precisely, HUMANS. In fact, i detested them. For many reasons. I haven't really sorted out my thoughts about it because at the moment it's still a disorganised prejudice.

I didn't like the way people ate.
I didn't like the way people talk.
I didn't like the way people thought.
I didn't like the way people behaved.

And it definitely didn't help that I live in Singapore where some of these attributes are so pronounced, it is vulgar to me.

In other words, i detested human nature's negative side.

How often have we come across people so impatient and rude, inconsiderate and self-centred? It really irks me. And i belong to this human race.

But i guess in secondary school, i tended to be critical of everyone, everything. Should i say... to the point of lacking in humility?
I used to be depressed. From secondary school to JC. Always listened to sad music and feeling good when the soul soaks in it.

Personally, i think i've mellowed. Getting older, HOPEfully wiser.

Am still critical.
But in moderation.
And with more reason.

The quote below was actually an elaboration of something that i decided to take out from this entry due to its sheer "insultative" element.

"Great Linguist Noam Chomsky said, language provides the 'window into the mind'. Language is an expression of knowledge and therefore reflects the structure of the mind."
-cited from Harberlandt

That quote would be free for you to interpret.

But because i do not wish to quote something out of its context... The above means that the human mind has the fantastic ability to construct grammatically correct sentences. To form a sentence according to a certain rule so that what we say makes sense.

Argh. So i couldn't manipulate it.

But nevertheless. It is only common sense to assume that whatever someone says, reflects what their values, ideals and (whatever else) are.

NEWS: my dad actually found that my hair color was ok!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SHOCK.................................... -happiness- :-)

ONto something lighter:


I never had a long term goal, an ambition. I'm not sure if i was ever was like one of those telly kids who say, "I wanna be a doctor." "I wanna be a lawyer". I wanna... I wanna...

Not understanding exactly what their utterances mean.

But there're the exceptional few who can honestly testify that their present job was their childhood dream job. I don't begrudge them that.

Till now.
I have a goal.
Wot is it?

To be a Police.

How did i come to this conclusion?

One fateful day while mugging for the 'A's at my study table, i was reflecting on what i wanted to do with my life. To cut it short. The occupation that occured most to me was it.


Get ready for the cliched line.

I felt that being a police was a job that centres in the local community. People need you for protection. People generally need you. I saw this as a way to do something for the community. To get involved with it. To see how the streets of Singapore are really like. To those who know me well, i'm Queen Suaku (think: "mountain turtle goes to town"), through and through.

You get to see and experience the after-crime scene. You get to problem solve and take ACTION. You have to keep fit. (i need that sort of motivation man)

Sure, the pay is peanuts. But the police aren't starving and yes, they do get married still, in case you thought they had NO LIFE.
But it's a noble job. I can die knowing i've contributed somehow. Even if it's secularly.

What good is it to me if i were in an office job. I come home and watch TV. Go to work again. I'm contributing to efficiency at work/service and to my boss's wealth. But I don't feel included into the society BESIDES the fact that i'm contributing to the GDP.

Also, I can see it as a way to leak a little (you must be TACTFUL, it's a Government Service thingy so you gotta tread carefully) the Gospel to people. I don't know how that will integrate but i know since it's such a people related job... it just might work pretty well!

Oh yes and by the way. I'm going to be talking to this man from the FBI who is stationed in the American Embassey soon, once i garner all my questions on police work.

I cannot express my excitement.

Well. If it isn't meant to be in the line of being a police.

I'm going to be a teacher.
I love interacting with students and talking to them. Listening to their gripes, help them with work. See them understand their work and enlighten them on issues around them.
Need to go off to clementi to get something.

Till Then.

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

Uh Oh...

It just occured to me that my grandma is going to yodel her house down when she sees my hair.

For those of you who don't know, my grandmother is a pretty scary woman in her ways. Let me illustrate this statement with an example:

Calls for close family ties requires for weekly saturday visits to the granny's place. I was reading or doing something that interested me a lot more than eating. So, granny comes along and nicely tells me that there's bread, tea and fruits for us to eat. By the way, it wasn't a meal or something that everyone had to sit down to eat but the sort like, "if you want, you take". So i let her know ok, but i don't want. This repeats for about 2 or 3 times.
So, since i was doing something that took all my interest away from eating, i didn't eat anything.
Then, she comes by and scolds me saying:

"Do you know that i'm your grandmother?" or, "ni zi dao wo shi ni de ah por mah? wo shi ni de ah por, ni zhi dao mah?"

(non-direct, but this's what she REALLY means) Translation:

"I'm your grandmother, so can you please eat the things i give you? You behave as though i'm a stranger by refusing what i'm giving you to eat."

I understand her kindness and generousity and appreciate what she has done for me.
On the other hand... I can choose whether or not i wish to eat.
Sigh... So she scolds me for not eating. Does that sound weird or what.

OK. Back to writing the Abstract for my Lab Report. (again) It's pretty abstract business writing it too.

This and That

(Yesterday) I went to Pamela's place to dye me dead cells upon thy head. THANKS GURL! Now i've got new hair colour! Thanks so much.

This is by far the craziest thing i've ever done, besides abseiling and rock climbing among other things.
Not that I've never tried to colour my hair. I've tried it a total of 4 times before this particular episode. And my power black hair still more or less had its reign.

Now my hair is (clears throat): Light Brown, has Ash AND Gold Streaks, Orange-ish, leeme see (takes mirror)... Basically, it's really colourful. And i mean, REALLY. It's not jarringly striking and bright but a tad colourful for my conservative taste. However, DON'T GET ME WRONG. It's not that i don't like it. In FAct, I love it! It's something new, so i'm embracing change and i intend to enjoy it while it lasts.

Everyone at home has seen it, except my dad. Which's quite a scary thought. Don't worry dad, it won't affect my brain cells, my grey matter is still functioning and psychology still makes sense.

Speaking of which, i'm doing my lab report now. Cheem Sturff revolving around a simple experiment on helping behaviour (Social Psych.)

Random Thought:
Which language(s) came first, could anyone enlighten me?
You see. In Chinese, we have "ma ma" meaning "Mummy". And this is almost a "direct translation" of English's "Mummy", "Mama"," Mom", etc. Chinese is a very old language and so is English. So, which one took after the other? You get what i mean? And it's not just Chinese and/or English. Other cultures (which are FARRR from the Chinese way of life and speech) also take on "papa" to address fathers.


It's a rainy rainy day. Been pouring the whole morning. Bleak looking but God is still with me. Rain or Shine, it makes no difference. Oh, i want to recount the time when something was so "uncanny" it had to be God. DUH, of course it was.

One day i was walking home from school when i decided to drop by the condo supermarket (called "Laurels"). It was a bleak-ish looking day which contributed to bleak-ish JC life... Sky was cloudy and grey, wind cold, and it was drizzling. But i just felt so close to God at that point because I felt so close to Nature, God's Creation. A friend mentioned that Nature is (one of?) God's greatest envangelists. So true.

I distinctly REMEMBER tELLING MYself: It's only drizzling. By the time i get whatever i want, it would've stopped by then. FOR SURE.

So, feeling the way i did, (don't LAUGH) I started to sing a little song thanking God for being with me and loving me. Sort of like a "rubbish song" where you add your own lyrics and tune. So when i started walking around the shop looking for nice munchies when suddenly Aunty Gina walks into Laurels and goes,
AG: Hey JO!
J: Hello! What you doin here?
AG: Buying something lah.
J: Oh.
A: Later when you go home, we go home together ok? (Cos she had the brolly with her) It's raining vERY HEAVILY.
J: Huh. What? NOOO LAH! It was only drizzling when i came. When did you come?
AG: Just only what.
J: Issit?
AG: Ya, you go and see.

True Enough.


I. tell. You.

It was uncanny. The things that ran through my mind. It wouldn't rain. DEFINITELY. But it did. And just when I THOUGHT it wouldn't, it DOES. And who comes to my "rescue"? And what was it doing b4 i stepped into Laurels? Praising God.

Believe me. It was such a pour that i really didn't want to be walking around like that in my SCHOOL UNIFORM. I love rain but it was bad enough to make me wish i wasn't in it.

Incidents like these may seem small and insignificant to the 2nd party.

But when you experience the event, it's a sure sign. God is HERE, alive. And REIGNING even here on Earth (ahahah, forgive the pun, not intended though) and not just in Heaven. God is REAL. God loves me enough to send a little human angel to my rescue, at the RIGHT TIME, SPOT ON and not a second too late. Thank You Lord.

I may not have HUGE-IMPACT miracles (eg. instant healing of a broken leg) to share (yet) so i have this one. A simple event in my life but significant nontheless.

*goes back to Psych Lab Report. Maybe will blog later*

Monday, October 06, 2003

70% out, 30% work, and Listening to David Lanz, mah Favourite Pianist

First Up:
Kudos to Liangcai for setting up the tagboard! Yay! -applause- That was very much appreciated! Thanks!

Um, went for mua hair cut today at Pamela's new hair salon at Bugis. The ADDRESS IS, 235 VISTORIA STREET BUGIS VILLAGE SINGAPORE 188027.

Reasons for Everyone to go there:
1. It's a NEW place called, "Chapter 2".
2. It's just NEXT to the BBQ Pork store (Bee Chiang Hiang or SOMEthing like that).
3. And the BCH bbq pork store is just where the bus stop opposite Bugis Junction is. CANNOT MISS IT!
4. The concept of the place is cool. Plus Jazz music. Hope they don't change it to chinese music.
5. You get FREE DRINKS. Water and/or Soft Drinks!
6. After your hair cut, you get FREE Neo Prints of yourself and your hair stylist or receptionist if you happen to get a crush on him/her!
8. SHIOK hair wash
9. reasonable prices (unless it's rebonding you want.)

and the TOP REASON why you should go:
10. They use a special kind of scissors that cost a handsome $XXXX for a set.

Pamela is my childhood friend from Monkey Years ago when we used to go to church together. It's great that we still keep in touch. Who would have thought that she would become a stylist one day and cutting my hair as an almost-Pro? WOOOH!

Ok, time to mug. *SMOOOOOCHIE*
Till then.
*somersaults out the window*

Sunday, October 05, 2003

Random Thoughts while Studying

Was studying psychology when the itch for the typing came.

Do you know what's ironic? I was studying memory, recollection and forgetting and realised that i couldn't remember what i had just studied.

So then came the gripe about the "Singapore's Brainiest Kid" show. It's quite an engaging show, especially if you're trying to pit your skills against the kids' on the show. You either gawk and sigh when they display their brilliant-cy OR laugh out loud at them when they didn't know something you did.

How do u define intelligence? I'm sure there's an article somewhere but i'm going to go ahead and ramble anyway.

An average person's I.Q, so i've read, is 100. Remember Forrest Gump. He had an I.Q of 70. I'm assuming "person" is referring to an adult. The winner of the show was this Whiz Kid, in MENSA mind you, called Perry Lam, endowed with an I.Q of 130. That brings me to ask, does I.Q increase with age? I Hope not, I Think not. If it does... most of us are ALL pretty slow then. The last time i "checked" my I.Q (can one check one's I.Q accurately? I.Q varies with time, age, place maybe, your other multiple intelligences, and even how much you slept for the last few nights.) it was 120+.
Perry is 11 years old, if i'm not mistaken.

Most of the questions on the show seemed to me to be testing general knowledge, ability to recall those memorizations. Except for the bit where u must race against the clock. Their minds had to work on the double...

So, if these questions didn't really test real intelligence... how did it manage to fish out Perry, who does have the exceptional I.Q? Are the questions actually credible in testing for intelligence? So are we saying intelligence is about being widely read? Is intelligence about how much you can recall to answer those questions?

How do you define intelligence?
I'm sure there's an article somewhere...

Does it occur to you that somewhere among his opponents, there might actually be another kid with an I.Q higher than his but it just wasn't his/her day? Freak incidents like that do happen.

Even to the smartest of smarts.
I'm sure Perry has had his share.
And celebrities still fart.

I'd say 80% of the questions are knowledge based, how much you actually KNOW. Therefore, is the amount of knowledge proportionate to I.Q points? Seems obviously stupid to me.

Want to round up my post with something plausible regarding the matter but my head is in limbo state again. Can't really think.

Oh yes, did i mention that today's weather was so gorgeous? The sky was a pretty blue, the clouds were fluffy and white. There were the high lying ones that stay where they were but change in shape over time while there were the low lying ones that cruised across the skies rapidly as the wind blew... The wind was coldish too! Like Aussie. It was one of those, "Thank you Lord... your Creation is just so beautiful and i wish you could create more days like these" days. You life your head to look at the sky outside your window and just smile. Even as the night enfolds us, the blue sky gone but only from sight, the beauty of the day still remains. Maybe days like these are created so rarely so that we can learn to appreciate them more.

Brings me to the day i went to a little "cafe" at St. John's Island. I went there a lot back in secondary school for leadership camps. There were these wind chimes made from shells that hung from the ceiling and dangled down. They were pretty huge i must add. But when the sea breeze blows, the wind chimes created one of the most pleasing auditory experiences i've ever had so far in my life. It sounded like slow flowing water from a stream... soft-like and mellow. Calming and pleasing to the soul. Wanted to ask the uncle-uncle where he got them from.

Imagining the huge thingy hanging down from my ceiling makes me want to laugh.

The Next Day of Trial

Nah, nuthin' serious, still trying to figure this blogging thingy out. I've progressed from not even having it published to actually playing around with the gadget. GO TECHNOPHOBE!

Saturday, October 04, 2003

Ok people, *WAVES FRANTICALLY* If there's only ONE or only a few posts visible (which is WRONG for a chatterbox like me), play around with the Archive bit and the rest should come out. Dunno what's up with the system. Bullying the technophobe. If it's going to pursue the heartless bullying, i might swear off the computer and live in the 17th Century.

Title??? I can add TITLES!!!!!

this system never fails to scare me. One minute it shows me nonsense, next it deletes my entire blog contents. WOT?! Don't mind me, I'm just testing the system. Upgrading, experimenting... bah. I could be mugging.

The First (or "last") Post

Hm, really new at this. -prod, prod-

Now, what's next?

Right, let's begin. Thought i'd call this site "thevacuum" for a few reasons.
1. A vacuum cleaner entered my room, sucking up the stuff from the floor. What else do u use a vacuum for.
2. The thought of it striked me as a perfect example of myself.

Ok, so maybe you might associate it with me being a brainless goose complete with a very much empty cavity with a dried prune of a brain rattling in there.

Maybe so.


I've always thought that my life has always been in some limbo. My emotions, direction in life, etc.
Everything seems noisy, blurred, unreal, muffled, jumbled. Whatever goes in, is a mess. Just like the vacuum cleaner.
Things that i say tend to hop from one point to another and then suddenly there can be a whole barrage of words.

Vacuums are defined as an empty space, devoid of any form of object, life form, (yada yada). But then, it also sucks the #%^#!#@$^ out of the atmosphere and whatever else's around. So where does everything go? I'm sure there're scientific explanations but for the purpose of my blog, let's say i'm not as well read as i wish to be so i shall leave it as that. (I shall make THAT my long term goal, and maybe make MY LONG TERM GOAL my long term goal, and maybe...)

I've been debating the issue of starting this blog. For one, i was sceptical. Why. Defeats the whole purpose of writing a diary. I shan't delve into the definition of a diary.
Two, i'd have to write everything twice, since i keep the traditional paper diary. Now that has been a practice since primary school? So you see how much i value the old ways. But then... argh, i will eventually get used to the drill.
Three, it takes up my precious time i can use to mug. ("mug" for those who don't know, is a term we, collectively speaking, students refer to as studying really hard)

But as you can very well see. I gave in. Because the thought of my friends commenting on my blog makes it worthwhile(provided they actually bother to read my writing) and the fact that i can secure a place in the web is an interesting concept. Can "google" find me? Also, I can write all about what God has done for me. That was inspired by an ex-schoolmate of mine.

OK! Now about MYSELF...

Had and still having a good education experience. I'm not a pure "whatsoever-ian" because i have been blessed with the opportunity to go to varied schools.

Primary: Raffles Girls' Pri. Sch.
Secondary: Ghim Moh Sec. Sch.
Pre-U: Anglo-Chinese Junior College
Tertiary: Monash University

I'm proud of all my schools and i daresay that i'm the sorta bloke who loves school unity and camaraderie.

Right now, am doing a degree in behavioural science, majoring in Psychology (the BEST ACADEMIC STUDY EVER, on par with or after BIOLOGY) and Sociology.

Love: horses, all my lovely friends, family. camping. THE SKY AND EVEYRYTHING THAT IT HAS TO OFFER. Band MUSIC, NEw Age, (DAVID LANZ) and books. There's more, but like i said, everything's jumbled..can't remember.

Oh, we just got our new car, our MAZDA 6!!!!!!!!!
Gorgeous baby there, chio as can be.
A lovely silver green though grey is... nice too. Black is nice but too hot to be in yeah. Might just come out steamed or broiled.

Anyway, i think this's enough for now. Time to mug and to collect more thoughts (both academic collecting and for blog content) or waiting for the next whim to give my digits a good workout over the keyboard.

Till Then.
*jumps out the window*