Saturday, September 25, 2004

Pain... but there is also this thing called, Grace.

Hello peeps! Many thanks for the comments that you've been leaving behind, and i want ya'll to know that they are very much appreciated! With effect from NOW, i will be replying to your comments via the comment box itself. This way, i can reply faster and blog posts will be shortened. Thanks. :-D
Yeah, so no replies here because they're in the same commentary box where you left yours.

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Went for corporate prayer yesterday.
It's like a prayer session, outside the usual church services, concerning social issues in Singapore and beyond. It's open to basically everyone... The more the merrier of course.

I at first felt so odd, and wanted to beat it the moment i could.

But as we begun praying, i felt like... there's so much to pray for, there's so much that we need God's intervention in.
And the reality of God, the Real, just seeped in.

This has brought me a tiny step closer to having a stronger relationship with my Lord.
That is something that i've been craving for inside...

The change that i feel inside, regarding my relationship with God seems to have been kind of... tweaked, so to speak.
It feels different.
In a good sense.

Since joining cell, it feels like a step in the right direction of sorts.
It's been uncomfortable, no doubt, but a necessary "uncomfortableness".
And i'm cautiously happy over the uncomfortableness.

I hope that in time to come, God's plan for me will be revealed and then i can FINALLY really do something that God desires of me so that i can be a good and faithful servant and make Him happy.

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Was doing a little background work and kinda got the answer i was/was not looking for.
Apart from that, i also found out something i wasn't expecting at this point.
Not expecting at all.

Started out so hard and painful, the knife thrusting deep, deep inside.
The "fact of life" that i have been preparing myself for has finally arrived.

The stabs soon eased off but had inflicted a wound that left me to bleed...
I needed an outlet and God was gracious.
Thanks God and thanks Germ. :-)

I am blessed with good friends... How wretched life would be... without you.
Thanks for listening and thanks for sharing.

The grace of God is the one that pulls me through the pain.

It has been some time already since the day i committed my pain and unresolved feelings to God and told myself to LET GO.
Thanks mom dearest for being there for me. You were my pillar of strength and guiding light when i needed you.

As cruddy as it is, i guess i have to admit that i am glad and thankful that it happened at this point.
"This point" meaning: I have come to a time when i know it is probably an inevitable thing, part of life and would happen at any time.
And feel quite, quite, cool about it too.
(but how come NSFs got so much time to chase girls one? *:-P*)

Yup, so it has happened at a time when i am mostly over it, had time to heal pretty much from the bigger wound, and am closer to God.
What good timing. :-)
Thank you Lord.

I feel such peace to know that i can kneel down to pray and tell God how i feel.
He is everlasting, He is ever present and HE LOVES ME.
Even if the world does not.
And he does not.

Well, i can't say i am clapping with utmost glee and hopping around like a headless but elated chicken, but i can say with certainty that it has been for the best that we aren't together.
And i look forward to the moment when i can feel happy for them... Sincerely.

OK! Enough MELANCHOLY here!

I have a life ahead and a kind of new beginning.

And God, is in the middle of it all.

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Man, WHAT A SMILE!!! (cannot tell you la, sorry.)
So genuine, so cute, and looks just like J.
How uncanny.
The male version.

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Till Then.
*may update at a more godly hour... It's 3:27am, saturday.*

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