Friday, July 09, 2004

Not me.

Uhm... ok. I guess it puts some worry away when doctors say it's a common problem. I hope that it can be cured and not just treated.
Haha, head stand?! Goodness, that's quite a psychological barrier giver indeed. I never ever brought myself close to even doing a cartwheel for fear of breaking my nack and cracking my head. Be careful ok? Getting hit and cut on my arm is nothing compared to potential injuries sustainable from a bad head stand... Be careful hor sister.
Broken families a minority? If i'm not mistaken, there was a recent article that said that divorce rates have increased already. Yeah.

Heh, maybe army guys get worse stuff than external bruises. My cousin broke a finger while another friend injured his back, or was it his leg.
Managed to hide it from my mom for one day only. The minute she saw it, she thought some person beat me up. heh heh.

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Superimpose that expression on my face and that's how i'd look. Posted by Hello

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I've added a new link "Solo Piano Radio" under Bare Essentials. For those who incline towards heartfelt, mostly on the slow-ish side, romantic, sometimes sad, piano music... This is for you.
I've loved new age piano since Eliane, a good friend, introduced me to David Lanz's music.
Enjoy it dearies.

Something interesting happened but i'm not sure of the cause. About two days ago, i had this strong urge within me to just sit down, do nothing and revel in God's presence.
As in, something inside me was telling me to sit down, spend some extended time doing nothing but let my soul commune with God.
Something was calling me, tugging at my heart. Think it lasted throughout the whole day.

The thing is, i was a stubborn old goat and didn't obey, and instead left it until the time before i slept.
This is a perfect example of how busy we humans can get that we sideline God for the sake of doing other things.
I might say: God, i want to know you, i want to see you, i want to experience you. Speak, for your servant is listening.

But then, i throw it away.
This is a perfect example of disobedience.

After i thought of it, i realized how stupid i was.
How can i POSSIBLY reject a conversation with God?
How could i treat him that way in the light of the things i have said in prayer earlier?

Such is my sinful nature.

On the other hand.
Was that prompting really from God? or was it just my inner self sounding the red light alarm, telling me that i need to rest from the turmoil around and within me.

Recently i had a talk with Ivan about God speaking.
Verdict: Maybe i had brushes of his voice but never knew it, or maybe it was just my head/emotions/hormones talking.
I can never tell the difference for sure.

Recently, while praying, each time i pose a question, i seem to have this "thing" answering me back. Just like in a dialogue. The language is nothing divine-ish sounding. Very ordinary.
Is it my hormones? My head? My conscience? God?
I sure hope i'm not getting schizophrenic.
Ok, ok, i'm not.

But still, i wonder...

You know how when matters of the heart have been stirred and then everything you see reminds of things you would rather not?
How can i live life without having these invisible donkeys with sacks trotting beside me?
It's all with God already. Why do i still get pelted?
*Get Lost you!*

For once, in my entire school life, my mom actually referred to this one particular guy that she said she really wouldn't mind if he was my boyfriend.
She said that he has her stamp of approval and she wouldn't mind at all if i bring him back home to see her.
I thought it was hilarious, the conversation.

*Wanna eat laksa* Erm.
Anyway, there're times that i find myself running on auto-pilot. I do things without thinking. And when my task is done, i simply just stand like an idiot and wait for instructions.
But there're times when my senses are on a high and my mind whizzes with so many thoughts and wonderings.
Each time i remind myself to blog it, but i forget. :oI

Cousin's wedding is coming up at the end of this month. Was suppose to have actively gone on a diet to lose some weight... keyword: "suppose".
Well, does feeling skinny count?

All righty. Click to publish. There we go.

Till Then.
*The Heavens declare... You're Glorious, Glorious."

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