Sunday, May 02, 2004

Long Post. Filter if need be.

YALI:
Yo SISTER! WA! I've not heard from u in AGES!!! (ok, exaggerating here, but hey, miss you!)
I suppose you'll be ending your exams soon... Er, so i heard about the conflicting news reports about some examination answers begin posted on the net. Hope that does not affect you... Though it was for accounting students.
HAHAha, was laughing about your lack of brain cells. Aw, don't worry. In fact, your neurons should be working better after examinations!
We shall meet up okokok...?

1.
It is very depressing to hear of people dying, as of late.
I know people have been dying all over already for the longest time, but recently, i guess it has hit home and i've been keeping with the news.
First, collapse of the Nicoll Highway, Second, the collapse at the worksite at Fusionpolis and Now, the stabbing of a sales assistant at West Mall on saturday.
A SHOPPING MALL, mind you! With a whole concentration of people in an enclosed area. Not that he was a mad man, but the fact that he did it in full view of the public!
It was reported that the suspect, or rather, the murderer (oh please, as much as the "innocent until proven guilty" thing says... ) was loitering around on friday itself.
He RETURNED to complete the abhorrent deed the next day. That means that he had a day to sleep over the decision.
What does that say?
Murder was on his mind already.
For how long, only the assailant REALLY knows.

2.
What do you think of guys who switch focus of affection in less than a few weeks, plus, to a person he never felt for before.
Jerk... or simply Starved...
They should never be allowed to breed, for the sake of future generations of womankind.

3.
I felt that i had accomplished enough work on wednesday, so i decided to give myself a little break on thursday.
Not much of a break really. But just some fresh air.
Well then again, not quite.
*sigh*
I really must try to let loose sometimes.
You see, i do not go out unless i have a reason to. I must have something to accomplish. I don't see myself going out just to "hang out".
TO me, i don't find it possible.
IF anything, the closest it would get would be... If i go out for the purpose of EXPLORING. So that means walking around withOUT a particular direction in mind, BUT doing so for the purpose of DISCOVERY.

Anyway, yeah. I went out on thursday to top up the bus card.
After which, i walked by Macs towards the bus stop.
Being deprived of late, of fast food and especially fries, i decided to indulge.

The real point of this, is this.

As i sat, like just one of the many random people who sit along the walkway on tiled seating outside Bestway, i noticed an old lady opposite me.
Now, she was eating "gao luck" (pronounced as such but not sure of real spelling).
With her, were a few filled NTUC bags.

As i am munching on my fries, she was munching on her chestnuts.

And i thought:
- Look at the different things we are eating.
Not to generalize for sure. But me, from the generation of fast food. Her, the older generation enjoying the treats from the past.
- How would i be like when i get to her age?
- *reflects on way of life and lifestyle, how blessed i am, how unstable my life is, how i have not achieved very much*
Then i think.
- Would i be able to support my family next time? (if i would be so... -hm, privileged? subjective- to have a family)
- Would i end up just being a person who toils and toils in a low paying job, living a less comfortable life than i have now?
Though i might have everything i need now, that does not mean i will be living in the same luxury in future.
- She looks contented with where she is and what she was doing. Where will i be at her age? Can i live contentedly too?

And so the bottom line is this:
I am going to make sure my kids get all the things i have now. I am not seriously deprived, i was never ill treated, i have been blessed from the day i was born.
But it scares me too, that my life is in its beginning stages and if i do not get my qualifications, it is going to be difficult to survive in a society such as ours.
Some people still make it despite the odds. But me? I have been too sheltered and spoonfed.
If i will be thrown into such a situation... God Help. I won't be able to cope on my own.

4.
Made a trip to safra on friday with coach. Not many compound bows to choose from.
Safra had a couple of Mathews, a PSE, and a Darton, i think.
Coach has a better idea. I have to decide on whether i want to take up that idea.
But anyway... i have made my choice.
I have decided to join the national training team.

I hope that in time, i will gain the full support of my family, my friends and potential team mates.
This is a slightly life altering decision.

I do not feel that i am not at peace with my decision.
I guess i feel pretty all right about it after making my decision.
But the thing that unsettles me is fear of what's COMING.
I suppose that is natural for any newbie.

5.
How would you feel if BOTH your parents take on a mission trip to a country that is a ticking time bomb?
"Trust God", we all think.
It is hard... :-(

6.
Recently, we thought that our beloved dog Jed was having asthma attacks.
Brought him to the vet and discovered that the "attacks" he was having were called "Reverse Sneezing".
That is when he "forgets" how to function and starts warping himself up.
Happens when they get excited or... it just happens as and when.

It is common among dogs actually.
My previous dog had the same problem.

But now that we know what that is, i am wondering what exactly took his life.
In his last hours, he had a breathing problem.
It was a strange affliction that took him within 1-2 days.

We didn't want Jed to leave us the same way Prints (last dog) did.

Jed is a spoilt little brat. Everyone loves and hates him at the same time.
He's a devilish angel, all packaged in a small frame.

He has destroyed 1 and a 1/2 drawers and a few pieces of wooden furniture.

He:
1. looks like a dog
2. eats like a pig
3. climbs like a mountain goat
4. jumps like a kangeroo
5. Trots like a hackney pony
6. probably barks louder than a German Sheppard
7. mad as a hat
8. mischievous as a monkey
9. steals like a well trained bandit
10. has a personality bigger than himself and big enough to embarrass a dog thrice his size.
11. Probably "suffers" from "i'm a Doberman" complex too. (haha)

I could go on and on and on about his exploits around the house.

If not for the charges we'd be slapped with by the law, we would've thrown him out the window already.

Aiya... but that's just how Miniature Pinschers are.
Too big for their little paws.

7.
Been raining for the past few hours.
It's SUNDAY! My ARCHERY DAY!
BLAH... I've not left the house yet as i'm waiting for a good time. I hope that just because the west end of Singapore might have ended its share of the downpour, the east will start its downpour.
That's the whole problem with outdoor sports and being in Singapore.
The friggin' weather.

Ok. Gotta go.
Ta-ta all.
Always appreciate visitors. :-)

Till Then.
*Joline needs Discipline*

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