Tuesday, March 30, 2004


My state of isolation from other people is giving me the feeling of aimlessness.
I hope this is hormonal.
In addition, i know i have work to do. But i'm blatantly wasting my time away thinking of doing things other than work.
What the dong is wrong with me.

Remember the friend who pissed me off last week?
Well, he actually made the effort to mend things after one week of not speaking.
That is totally respectable.
I should learn that kind of humility.

Have not called Simon yet. I feel a cold shiver of fear run through me everytime i think of calling him.
(just felt it)
(and again)
(even in my fingers and toes)

I have school work and i just remembered that i have driving to take care of. Archery is still a blur.
Too many things on my hands now.
I know where my priorities lie but i am weak.
God, please help.

Think i shall go and occupy myself with some housekeeping. Writing up my schedule especially.

I have met a very interesting person.
Makes my mind go bogus and feelings go a bit haywire.
Not in the good sense.
A contradiction?

I am amused to find that my good friend has changed her status quo in Friendster.
*gasp! where no man has ever gone before!*

I am in love with the compound bow.
There is a feeling of power, control and beauty.

I love the whole set-up.
Clad in an arm guard, wrist sling, release aid.
While the bow is decked with the bowsight and stabilizer. (haven't gotten down to trying with the scope yet)
Love it.

Standing all alone at the shooting line, sizing up the target, with the bow held low.
Shoulders back and level, body erect, head up. Eyes focused.
When the feeling is right, lift the bow above head level in the predraw aim position and then bring it down to anchor.

With the bow drawn, find the target centre with the bowsight and align them both. Wait and feel for the right moment in time then gently pull the lever.
Watch the arrow fly straight and thunk into the yellow region.
Grin inwardly to self.

Like Daniel at DMArchery who came by.
"When you've gotten the accuracy, it's time to play the mental game. It becomes very "zenny". Imagine(visualize) your arrow hitting th bull's eye. It's very zen after that."

Funny the other day while at Kino, i picked up a book on the Zen of archery (something to that effect), at the same section. It wasn't there before.
I flipped through a bit.
Wa, so airy.

I didn't get to go to Borders that day.
No money to splurge on books.

David is a God on the bow!
He said he was approached to make the national team but it was and IS a grand high pity he can't afford the time.
He's a funny, as in humourous, fella.

There was something i noticed.
Usually, i would have a problem when i'm the only girl around a bunch of guys.
I usually have trouble carrying myself.
This is due to my upbringing.
I am unashamed of stating that fact.

Apparently, the archery range was testosterone laden but i hardly felt i was different.
Of course the occasional family came by with girls but after they left, I was the only person there with no friend(s) for company. And even when someone else came alone, it was a guy.

Archery really is an individual sport.

Come to think of it.
To give you an insight into poetry.
If that line "Archery really..." was found in a poem and written just like that. i.e, one line on its own, it is likely to be interpreted as this:

The poet chose to place this line separate from the main body to emphasize the point of individuality.
This illustrates the point that archery is as individual and singular as the line that was placed apart and alone.

Crappy right.

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