Wednesday, January 26, 2005


*Replies're in the usual places. :-)


From now on, i will be saving a few dollars because of the termination of that silly toto service and BBRR thingy that a certain phone service provider offers.
Useless things, i tell you. The lot continue to charge you till you've decided that you've had enough.

Gee, things are never as wonderful as you see on the surface. It's money all around. Bah.

Looks like my holidays are drawing to a close, now that the collection of course materials, aka textbooks, will be trawled in.
I have to say a huge thank you in advance to a kind soul with the 4 wheels.

I remember that during last year's book collection, i had to go all by my lonesome to school and back home, with 4 UNforgiving "sacks" of books and CD and VCDs. To compound the adventure, it had to rain like nobody's business.

As a result, i had vowed that the next time round, i'd rent an uncle and his lorry to bring me home.

So, now you see how thankful i am, though i do honestly feel that i can (i think) manage.
Nevertheless, thanks. :-D

I am feeling positive about this year's modules because they both sound mighty interesting. Ok, maybe on the surface, but hey, i am up for the challenge.
Child Development and Cognitive Psychology.

Sounds little but since both courses run throughout the year, they are going to go in pretty deep, i think. More on that once i get to devour the books tomorrow.

(ok, that was way too positive, but hey, i have to get into this reading frame of mind eh? Encourage self..., encourage self... I must come up with a personal mantra.)


I am still in the midst of trying to figure out what to do. And how to do it tactfully. And soon.

Is my heart unable to love fully and truly now since it has been punctured, torn and scarred once?
Feels like it.

Or perhaps i just haven't come face to face with whatever that REALLY makes me tick.
Maybe i have become harder to please now. I think that's true. *nods to self*

What to DO? What to dooo...?

I cannot let this drag on, it does no one no good.

My studies takes precedence over everything now. I think that even if the Tick Inducer comes along right about now or anytime when my studies is at a crucial point, he's going to have to wait till i get my paper.

I cannot live through another, "STUDIES COME FIRST, DROP THIS NOW! OR ELSE!" and live under the bondage of fear through my years in school. No, no. No way.

*** ***

In the meantime, i need to decide on what EXACTLY it is that i want to do in life. For life.

Right now, these are what i have in mind:
- Policewoman
- Psychologist in the Psychological Unit
- Paramedic in the SCDF
- Teacher.

It's going to be a journey of discovery as i continue with my studies.

You know, ever since that day when i saw 2 civil defence vans zoom by, i had it in my head that i wanted to be a paramedic sometime.
And more so when i came across this SCDF brochure not long after.

About a day ago too, i witnessed a minor-ish car accident unfold right before me. (no accident is pleasant but at least no one was hurt. The only vehicle involved was the accident vehicle)

Feeling the need to run over to help, i went over to see what i could do. Thank goodness no one was hurt.

Apparently, this lorry-like thing was braking as it tried to stop at the traffic light. As a result, it skidded, swerved sideways and toppled over to its side. Mounted a bit of the curb. But there was no pedestrian walkway, so, thank God.

Quite a dramatic sight, i must say.

The thing that struck me was, you never know when something so simple, so ordinary, can turn into something a lot more devastating.
I was just reflecting upon how the lorry, ok, people, got itself/themselves into its predicament and realized that, gee.

All it was trying to do was, BRAKE.
It wasn't as if the lorry was going at a breakneck kind of speed. It looked pretty normal enough.

And just by doing something as simple and normal as braking, you can get yourself into a fix and potentially die.

In other words, things can happen so unpredictably. A simple act/occurence can turn out to be deadly.

So if let's say someone takes a walk along a walkway parallel to the road with his back facing the forward flow of traffic, if some car decides to go berserk, then...
Sayoonara Sir.

It's like how those few people got killed just because they were standing at the traffic light along the road, or, just because they were standing at the bus stop.


Something so mundane, can turn out so fatal when some freak turn of event happens.

We can die, any time.

Have you found what your life is about?

Oh yes, so i was saying...
What do i want to be when i graduate. I honestly don't know which i will incline towards to now. But i will, when the time draws nearer.

Or when God shows me the path which i must take. Be it something totally and radically different.

Why these few jobs? I think i'll talk about that the next time around.

Till Then.
*Politics is my worst enemy. -Cringe-*

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