Monday, August 31, 2009

If my current life could be summarized into a song title, it would be: What the @#$%.

Not only is my workload crazy, if that isn't bad enough, my personal life has to take a beating as well.

Yeah. What the @#$%, is a good song title.

Am i mad at God? No. Am i still dependent on God and trusting in Him? You bet. In fact, God is all the more important to me now than ever before. He is the only one i trust. Because humans can be so damn heinous.

But right now... God is out of the picture. My head and heart is just simply swimming in anger and sadness and i think the amount of poison being generated inside me right now can kill off a few hundred rats.

I need counselling. Pronto.

I want to run away. From school, work. Life.
Just make me freaking disappear.

7 comments:

Mimosa said...

I can relate to the wanting to disappear part. Therapy is expensive.. otherwise, I'll be going heh. Cheaper form is to talk to friends... wanna meet for cheap therapy??? :)

zzen said...

therapy is more professional advice. n i tink some things we dun want others to know alot of.jo, if u need a listening ear, go to frends. if u need professional advice, see a counsellor! just go. wats there to lose?it may be costly. but to me is worthed it all

Sensei Lucille said...

i think it's better that you seek professional advice...they can see things from a clearer point of view...furthermore...this involves considerations regarding your career direction right?

van said...

I want to disappear too.

V

Anonymous said...

tell me about it. I am PLAGUED with work too. Let's battle it out together gal! You aren't alone at all!

And yes - I can totally understand about the workload part - I felt like crying thinking about it too.

LT

Sensei Lucille said...

you can afford the therapy. Just go for it...take good care of your personal well being...

joline said...

mimosa:

HAHAHHA. That made me laugh, mer. Sure... We can meet for cheap therapy... We can make it cheaper by having it at my place or something. :P

Which reminds me, I messaged you about bimbo night twice and no reply leh!

zzen:

i will go, in due time. i know that i have to... the busy-ness just seems to force me to do what i need to do and ingore my pain. Argghh.

Lucille:

Nope, nothing to do with my career directon.

And no, i cannot afford therapy. The only one i can "afford" is the one by church, which is good for non working students like me. The only thing i need to give, is time!

V:

Where you want to disappear to?

Greece, or the Maldives would be nice. Better still, if we could be zapped up to Heaven like. Right. Now.

LT:

*grips your hand*
Okay! Step by step...
You sounded so busy over your sms.