Friday, January 30, 2004

Yabbering. Too much of it.

My cousin from Australia is here at my place!
He'll be staying for a week.
Haven't seen him in yonks but he still looks the same as ever.

How the years have passed but age takes no toll on him. Except to cloud him with responsibilities. Maybe "cloud" is a word too negative.
To be clearer. He doesn't have problems, just that i view adult responsibilities as THE thing i'm most horrified about.

And they are approaching...

Have been planning a little for the future in terms of education and to which job it can lead me to.
I must say i'm happy with what i see.

But i do know that in the coming years, i have much to accomplish.

Firstly, i am planning for my Honours. Not every Tom, Dick and Harry is able to get a good Honours degree.
When i look inside myself, i realize that i do feel like any run-of-the-mill kind of achiever. Or rather, just an average kind of student with no special talent or brains.

If i were to say anything about talent, i'd say i'm a Jack of All Trades, Master of None.
Ever since i was a kid, i was about average at most things.

Could do some sports well enough, could make some music and did average [where, average=(good performance+bad performance)/2] academically in school.
None outshined the other.
Been entrusted with responsibilities as a leader in school as well.

Not quite sure if you'd call that a well rounder. A well rounder, to me, would be someone who EXCELS in whatever arena he or she gets involved in.
Not mediocal.
Like me.

Therefore looking at my future, i'm going to have to -work really, really HARD- to reach my goals.
That is like one of the most dumb/cliche things to say, yet it is the simple truth, that is to be applied in reaching goals.
Unless your goal...
Enough implied.

I have 3 things in mind for the future. To be a:
1. Police
2. Teacher
3. Psychologist
(not in exact order)
in my years to come.

May add or subtract along the way.

I went to SIM on wednesday to collect my study materials

Stepped into unfamiliar grounds.
Plonked with TWO FULL BAGS of VCDS, CDS and BOOKS.

(I gushed to the lady: It's a bit overwhelming...
And she smiled at me)

Ok, so i stuffed what i could into my haversack and carried the rest in hand.

When i got out, it was POURING Mammoths and Dinosaurs.

So there i was, all ALONE. With no gallant knight or a kind aunty to help.
No one to even point at and laugh at me.

Strapped to my back was a sack of books, and my hands were full with more.
I felt like a CAMEL!!!
A Bloomin' CAMEL!

I almost couldn't carry my stuff and hold my brolly all at once.

The next time i collect my stuff, i'm either going to be driving OR, i'll RENT a lorry and the lorry uncle.

WAlking to the bus stop was gruelling and sweat was streaming down my face. Am suprised nobody got hastily off to leave me the entire stretch of chair.

It didn't help that i slipped and almost fell!

But thank God that after my bus ride, that heavy downpour gave way! And i could do without the brolly.

After the whole episode,looking back in retrospect, i realize that though after complaining, a little challenge and difficulty makes life less dreary.

But in bigger and less trivial matters like the above, i think we should just cease complaining sometimes and simply soak in the challenge and enjoy it.
Such experiences makes things less timetable-like and easy flowing.
Serves to give us pampered beings a kick in the arses.

Got back and proceeded to do heavy duty wrapping of books.

You know how it is like during primary school days when momma sits down and starts to wrap all your books nicely before school begins.

I remember once my mom found, i think, a sticker book inside my bag and was bloomin' angry with me.
Similarly, bringing toys to school was like a sin unless it was after the year end examination.

So, i laid out my stuff on the floor and realized that i'm going to have to read all this, and that my future so relies on the coming years.
Where i really have to DO EXTREMELY WELL in school and every grade i get must reflect on an Honours potential.
And i could feel fear beginning to rise in me.
But then.

I thought of God.

Suddenly, I felt and KNEW that i wasn't alone at all.
I have God with me and he's my helper in all that i do.
And i felt at peace.
Then, the whole pile of books didn't look so daunting anymore.
Because i know that I'm never going to be alone and God is my ally for ever and ever!

And those books were for only TWO modules. Ok, but i'll let it give and say that these 2 modules will be taking me through the whole year.

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