Van and i have planned to go watch Marley and Me! But we sure did not know that, when we took this photo... Somewhere either in Dec or Jan at some MRT station. It was after a party at Dom's place.

Cute right......................... Heh heh.

(if you're thinking: "that looks like some PE attire you're wearing Jo." Well, yes it was. We were suppose to come dressed to the party in our old school uniform. Only Joy and i did!)

Gah... i owe myself a ton of movies.

Changeling, Benjamin Button, The Reader, Slumdog Millionaire, Marley and Me, Transformers.

Hohoh.... OCBC Cycle Singapore, here i come!

I MUST take photos... somehow...

"Xiaojie xiaojie! Ting yi xia!" (include a line in dialect that means the same thing)
("Miss, miss, please stop!")

*jo turns around to see a hulking guy chasing from behind holding what looks like a magazine. does not notice this face.*

"Wo shi zhe ke ren..." *guy points at a photo of himself on a magazine photoshoot*

*at this, jo glances upwards slightly and with her peripheral vision, instantly recognizes the man!*

"Ni yao zhuo model mah?"
("Do you want to be a model?")

*jo waves hand at him to indicate "no" and smiles as politely (and uneasily) as possible and backs off*

"Ni shi xing jia po ren mah?"
("Are you singaporean?")

*jo says 'uh yes', and continues to back off and then turns to walk briskly away*

Guess who the man was? hint: the unfamous personality who lurks around orchard looking for girls to allow him to shape their eyebrows for them.

OH MAN... it was my first ever brush with this guy on the streets and i was alone and quite terrified! And so not flattered.... HAHHAHAHAHAA. But very amused!

He is actually taller than i had imagined him to be. And quite elaborately dressed... Like, glam streetwear and bling. (Er, not that i know what that really means but that was the first impression i got) Honestly, i really wonder how he survives living in Singapore. What does he do for a living? Does he have any family and actual friends? And more interestingly, how in the world does he constantly keep up his bizarre behaviour and personal opinions and viewpoints? Is he really, really like that?

I recently told a youth pastor that, "it is ridiculous that i am in counselling (a counselling student). It is ridiculous!" At that, he laughed heartily for the first time in our conversation, only after a good solid 1 hour or so of sharing.

So i shared with him about my fear(s) and why i thought it was utterly ridiculous, and we talked a bit about the prayer he said over me before and what God had told me through him. He was the same pastor who prayed about:

1. God wants to give, or already has given the gift of protecting, caring, laying down of my life for those i love, like a shepherd. But to do that, I first need to know the shepherd. Psalms 23.
2. A picture of an overflowing cup.
3. Jesus wants me to know that He stands beside me always, with his arm around me. (I REALLY needed to know that! I've always wanted God to show me that He's always close beside me.)
4. Love with Courage! (When pastor said this in his prayer, he digressed to tell me that he didn't know why he said that, but felt that it must be said.)

At that time, this pastor did not know me well and neither did he know that i was a counselling student.

Further into the discussion, he had let on that part of the reason as to why he wanted to catch up with me was because when he went back home that day (the day when he prayed for me) and he felt that God was saying to him, "that He (God) will groom me into someone i never thought/imagine that i would be".

(this is a very real concern for me... because who i am now does not match with who i think i should be or who i would like to be. and in view of my career choice, who i am is a huge factor.)

With that, all the memories of previous messages (all the same in meaning) from God spoken through different people in my life at different times flashed in my mind, and i was like... GOD! I'M WAITING! I WISH I COULD KNOW WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT, NOOOOW!!!

When i showed my pastor my incredulous face coupled with my incredulous situation, he said with a broad smile, "You must be on the right path. Because God chooses the foolish things of the world to shame the wise." (that's from 1 Cor 1: 27)

(The rest of the verse:

"... God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.
He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things - and the things that are not - to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before Him.
(and now the important part...)
It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus,
who has become for us wisdom from God - that is - our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore it is written: 'Let him who boasts boasts in the Lord'")

Honestly. I'm beginning to feel the heat in class, now that we are kickstarting the role play. Role playing is when we team up with 2 or more other classmates and we take turns to learn to be the therapist and client(s). Also, there is the co-facilitation of a support group.

I totally suck at it right now because i constantly am at a lost of what to ask my "client", my mind blanks out and freezes with despair when my client gives me a certain look or when i run out of things to say, or when i ask a question and realise that it is irrelevant. I often feel that my classmates do not benefit from me being a "stumbling block" (but only for now, NOT in future!!!!) and i feel so bad about it.

I am also beginning to see more conflicts happening in class, between classmates. Sometimes i may be a part of it and it's a sad and demoralising feeling to be on guard all the time. My class size is so small (at its smallest, there are only 5 students, and at its largest, 11 students) that word passes around very quickly.

What's more, let me tell you that working with adults as a young, bright eyed and bushy tailed noob is rather tricky. They are ultra sensitive to dynamics, classroom climate, the very subtle and underlying meanings that lie beaneath simple sounding words of other people. Nothing is as it SEEMS on the surface.

Because the training puts me in a really difficult position as an untried counsellor/therapist, the mistakes that i make are constant and so the feelings of disappointment and me having to berate myself happens all the time.

I'm beginning to see how though i know many things in theory, putting it into practice stumps me completely. I think i know many things, but i fail to deliver. I'm really at Ground Zero, crawling around on all fours trying to find a way of how to get onto my two feet.

Did i also mention? I am the youngest in class and the only one with no formal revelant experience. In terms of maturity/age and work experience, i am the least advantaged.

As you can already tell, the odds are huge... Where I am now, and the place where God is encouraging me with seems like a lifetime apart. The only thing that is keeping me assured and focused on my choice of career is the consistent assurance from Father God that i'm doing the right thing.

But i know that this is part of my moulding process and i have to go through with it despite it being painful... Being pressured and squished into a nice shape at the end of the day.

And really, that makes me confident (though still trembling in my shoes) enough to keep moving on, because of the knowledge that God has already paved the way for me and is cheering for me by the sidelines and at the finishing line.

I am super dui because i've been attacked by mosquitoes for 3 nights already...

Mozzies at first bit my arms and legs and body, parts that were uncovered by my blanket during the 1st and 2nd nights. So i got fed up and made sure that i was fully covered except for my face. I tell you, i was so annoyed when while sleeping, i hear the buzzing of their stupid mozzie wings NEXT TO MY EAR! Half asleep, i slapped my hand over my ear like, twice.

Which was a half stupid move because each time i did that, i got temporarily and partially deaf.

Then last night, the $#$#%$%^% bugs couldn't get their fill from me via my legs and arms because they were covered so them bug freaks bit me all over my FACE! DARNIT! I have 6 mozzie bites on my forehead can? I awoke scratching my forehead furiously yesterday night. I know i have a high forehead but please man, just when my zits were clearing up?!?!??! They also bit me on my cheeks. So now it looks like i have big pimples all over my face. Looks aside, it ITCHES! ARGH.

Super pissed off! It's actually quite funny when i tell people about it, but when i look into the mirror and/or when i feel the tingle of the itch, i get really really disgruntled man. Can i say something in hokkien please.

soft shell crab venture

So here's a fine specimen of my raw soft shell crab with his limbs all curled in and still a little frozen. He's quite a little guy really. (i realize i shouldn't be talking about the crab in such endearing terms given his circumstances. Hmm...)

In my palm.

According to cleaning instructions, the gills have to be removed. It's that shiny white part.

The layout and ingredients, part 1.

Layout and ingredients, part 2.

Crabs all cleaned and ready to be battered.

A mix of flour and egg.

In the pan.................

Tadah!

As you can see, the ones on the left look more crab like. That was during the beginning of the frying process when the egg hadn't messed itself up with the flour, so still giving the fried crabs their shape.

On the right, well, that's when flour and egg decided to become a mish and mash, so instead of looking like a batter covering the crab, it became more of like a crab omelette. Delicious nonetheless. :-)

***

Since these were pan fried and not deep fried (like those bought from shops outside that sell them at cut throat prices), you still get a good bite into the flesh and the juices will all come gushing out. :-) Because of that, i recommend that if you want to cook this, think up/look up a good marinade for the crab so that you maximise the role of the juices... You'll want something more multi dimensional in taste then my simple marinade of just salt and thyme.