****! ****!

overload, overload.

going bonkers. my mind is zooming from one corner to the other, thoughts and all things neurotic splishy splashy all over the place.

concerns over this and that, worries about that and this, nonsense spouting on my blog in rushes.

everything but essay content is exiting my mind.

i have Lush 99.5 pumping funky frequency through my ear drums, as i try to remain calm and in control, as i blink my tired eyes, and peer tiredly past hair in my face at the lappie screen.

made a radio switch to 97.2. chinese channel, are you surprised?
well, i've made a recent discovery that chinese love ballets can be quite easy on the ear and actually gently pleasing with the nice musical backdrop.

ok, i'm not to lose it. i'm trying not to lose it.

LORD. HELP. ME. PLEASE.

It's fear from last year. The baggage of pain and grades not proportionate to the amount of effort i put in.
The baggage, oh all the **** baggage that's making a stupid small essay such a big issue.

ok, stop.

BE STILL MY SOUL.