just to share a thought and opinion. mostly for the girls.
I used to be very affected by what i saw in magazines. Toned and slim women, with long limbs and glowing skin. No thanks to the 6 months subscription to Shape magazine. But after a while, i began to see that i can NEVER be like what i see in magazines because i am basically just not biologically born to have what they have! Simple as that. The best that i can do for myself, is to simply take care of my body, and just work it out to the best that it can be. And i've to accept that it will not be "perfect", still.
But you know what? Although i said that i've come to understand that i can only reach the best of what my natural body can offer, it does not mean that i must/will(all the time) attempt to do so.
Why? I am aware of the dangers of following trends and pleasing people. Because of my stand of what is truly important to me, I screen my motivations for wanting to have "the best that my body can be". Am i working my body so that i can meet the standards of what beauty is in society? Or am i working out to feel better about myself? Or am i doing it for my health? etc.
My point simply is this: Chase after what is truly beneficial. Don't chase after things that are temporal and superficial. And even if you do, somewhere, somehow, you will still need to find that peace within yourself, ABOUT yourself and your identity.
Do not hanker after impossibilities that will only leave you disappointed with yourself. Know reality and know where you stand.
Nobody said that i must follow and live up to what the world deems as attractive. I refuse to allow such standards to seep into my head to make me feel insecure.
Think about this:
In the past, fat women were considered erotic. Today, slim and less voluptuous women have taken over the stage. As you can see, the image and what constitutes beauty changes with time and social context.
So, what if one day, the fashion trend of being fat comes back again. Are you going to follow that trend? (think about your health)
Likewise, if the benchmark for skinny-is-beautiful skyrockets, shall we all become anorexic? (mind your health!)
My point is: Is it sensible to follow everything the world tells you to do?
If my values are not rooted in the world's, then the world cannot really hurt me too much with all its demands.
Which is why i do not purposefully or take it to heart that i MUST reach the best that i can. Because i know that in time, if i let superficiality sink into my mind and reason for my goals, i know that when the day comes when i can no longer upkeep what i desire or if i feel challenged by others around me, i will sink into pointless depression. Now, we don't want that, do we?
This can also apply to other areas in life. As long as a building is constructed on foundations of sand, it will crumble like a stack of cards the minute a storm comes.
So what/who/where is your firm foundation where you can ground all your beliefs, opinions, values and principles?
15 comments:
i think the notion of beauty is related to the affluence of the society. look, in the past, pple are poor, so only 'beautiful' pple are not the norm, meaning they must look fat to be considered beautiful. like wise, now alot of pple are eating junk food and wat not, so it is difficult to be stick thin. So being skinny and bony is considered beautiful. it is true that i find reading fasion magazines a bad influence. normally i find myself decent, but once i start reading mags i will find myself wanting to buy the things inside and to look like those models.i wan tat hair! tat IT bag! that awesome lip gloss! well. why can some decent women start writing magazines tat arent shallow and is informative!
anon:
i remember you mentioning this before... haha, that means i must've written this before as well. a die hard topic!
in a way, yes, affluence is related to the notion of beauty. in the past, if you were fat, it meant that you were wealthy and "reproductively healthy", and that was considered desirable. while being skinny was associated with being poor and unhealthy.
things are a bit different today. beauty is not so much about reproductive health (although there are studies about the mind appreciating shapely chests and hips still, because it signifies fertility.) anymore, but about objectification. a women's body has become something to be scrutinized and judged. as the world progresses (or regresses?), society, the media, fashion, consumerism, subcultures, has done that over the years.
anon:
Yet, i agree that affluence is an interesting point as well. In some cultures where food is scarce and top priority, even today, people are not too concerned with body image... But then, when you put some of these people in a culture where being thin is considered beautiful, their values change. Some cultures are more susceptible to such influences, some are not. :-)
and yeah... magazines can tease us and feed off our insecurities.
DARE magazine is a good choice that is not tat shallow. it is quite informative, of cos there is still abit of fashion but not so much lah. hmmm, i m thinking of putting aromatherapy in my room when i sleep. but i cant find that burner anywhere at home, now got to go and buy liao. myabe i shall just AIR Wick instead. a lavender one smells nice and sleepy
i found my burner! heng i nv go and buy one. on tat topic, the best solution i have is to leave fashion magazines alone lor. who as the money to spend a bomb on clothes and wat not. as if we have professional make up artists and hair stylists to style us. of cos we cant look like those models lah.
anon:
oh, i've never seen DARE before. Have you heard about this new one called Vanilla? I wonder what it's about. Sounds like something a bit different than what the current magazines offer. yeah, if u notice, a lot of those clothes featured in women's magazines cost unearthly sums of money. So... yeap, dont bother too much.
teehee, lavender is known to be an aid for inducing sleep. :-)
i find lavender too strong for me. it is so coying.u know wat i mean? i just bought a "black tea' from body shop.yikes smell like burnt chao ta smell. dun quite like it.
anon:
i've never heard of black tea!!! hoho. did u put some water with it?
neither did i. need to put water ar...how much? i think it smells not bad inside the bottle but it really stinks once i put in the burner, aiya shud have bought the passion fruit or strawberry one. sweet but i thought i want a relaxing one not a perky one. aiya...by the way, bihsna j8 body shop got sale at the atrium, not the shop. shower gels for 9.90. alot of things lah, the make up is limited though. i bought a foot spray 2 for 9.90. not bad. i like.
anon:
wwwwwwahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... tempted to go see. when's the sale until?
ah? i didn't know there was passionfruit! ARGH! so nice!
haha, oh man, maybe u try adding some water to the oil you bought. fill the bowl with water, maybe 3/4 and then add like, 4 drops of the oil and see if it smells better that way?
anon. wanna watch 881? or ratatouille? keep forgetting to ask you.. that n u're so elusive to contact too... ...
jo wanna watch?
ambrose:
i want to watch, yes! the rat one. hurhur.
but not this week though, cos i'm under a pretty tight scehdule.
doh! *thinks-thinks*
me'll figure out something ^_^
ambrose:
maybe... i'll pick out a few days and see when u can make it also? oh, besides, anon, is this open to anyone else?
open to everyone who wanna watch w me ^^ i might be watching rata w my other frenz tho, but there's still 881 and noreservation! ^^ i sooo wanna catch the latter =p
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